“Change is inevitable. Growth is optional.” – John C. Maxwell
Change is a weird one. It is ever present and one could argue it is the only constant in life, yet so many people don’t like it. So why is this? Why do people don’t like change if it is inevitable?
Below are a few reasons why people are afraid of change
3 reasons why people are afraid of change
1. Fear of failure
Very often we want to be perfect. We don’t want to fail. This fear of failure also feeds into apprehension towards change. Because changing and doing things differently can lead to failure. So here’s the thing, start reframing your relationship with perfectionism and see how this impacts your fear of change.
2. The uncertainty monster
The brain is constantly trying to predict the future by recognising patterns. In other words, it means your brain likes certainty. Hedden and Garbrielli (2006 – The ebb and flow of attention in the human brain. Nature Neuroscience, 9, 863-865.) highlight that even a little uncertainty causes your brain to generate an “error” response. This forces your brain to focus on the error rather than your goals. Change can create worry and fears and as humans, we would rather tell ourselves a story than not know what will happen. For example, we might already say that we can’t transition out of corporate because we are not good enough so that we can stay in status quo and achieve certainty.
3. Change means letting go
As people we have a hard time moving on and letting go. Closing of a chapter brings some grief and that is completely normal. Most people do not like pain, and so a lot of people avoid change so that they do not need to let go and feel that pain. We focus on the old stories rather than focus on the opportunities that lie ahead.
7 ways to look at change/ a transitions
My personal view is that it all depends on how you look at change. Because if you start looking at change and transitions differently, you can remove the fears and create stories that actually help you in your transition rather than block you. Below are 7 perspectives that people can take on when in a transition. I am curious which one you resonate with most and which one you want to try on!
1. I just don’t know how to do this. I don’t have what it takes, why even try
If this is your perspective you’ll most likely feel fear and have a lot of insecurity, self-doubt, or worry. As a consequence, you won’t even attempt the transition. It is worth clarifying though that neither perspective is good or bad. It’s all about whether you are choosing consciously or just taking on this perspective is your default. Be aware baby.
2. I’ll show the doubters wrong at all costs, I am going to smash this transition
At this perspective, you’ve got some emotions of defiance, anger, and potentially resentment going on. The action that will follow will be that you will do anything to have things go the way you want or have a lot of anger when the plan isn’t going as expected. You tend to blame others when things do not go swimmingly.
3. I want to transition successfully but not at all costs.
This is where you’ll start tolerating and compromising. You use coping mechanisms to keep going forward with the transition. You forgive others’ mistakes and reframe bad experiences.For example, you might tolerate other people’s judgement of your transition as them being jealous so you can move forward.
4. This is a big transition going from corporate to entrepreneurship. I want this to work out for the people around me too
There’s a lot of compassion and caring at this perspective. You are concerned about how others in your circle are experiencing the transition and you give yourself some kindness when things do not go as planned instead of beating yourself up or blaming others.
5. Whatever happens with this, I know I will learn a lot whilst working towards my dream
This is one of my favourite perspectives. You feel calm, have confidence, showcase curiosity, and have a lot of acceptance. This leads to an eagerness to learn and grow. You are still quite focused on the outcome (I want to make this transition happen and have more freedom and joy) but you start to understand that in reality, the best things happen when you focus on the process rather than the outcome.
6. Just the fact that I am having this experience is amazing.
Pure joy over here with this thought. You welcome change. You are in the flow and experience joy regardless of the outcome as the experience in itself is amazing. There is really never anything to lose and therefore you appear calm and confident.
7. I can experience this transition however I want. It is my choice.
There is absolutely no judgement here and you will feel fearlessness as you can choose however you experience the change/transition. It’s smooth sailing…
Book a connect call if you want to experience more flow in your transition. I’ve got you!